It’s been a tough couple of weeks parenting. Right now, I am typing this out wishing I was somewhere sleeping with no interruptions, on a soft, comfy, larger than the largest bed, for about a whole week, alone (ahem, Mother’s Day anyone?). I have not been able to accomplish a ton around the house, yet I decided to learn how to start a new business in the busiest, most trying time of my life. Isn’t it funny how life happens? Maybe you’re reading that line thinking “It’s really not funny.” If so, I can relate.

About 15 minutes before writing this, I was trying to get my youngest baby down for a nap and by the end of it I was in full on tears. He’s 9 months old and he’s my fifth child, so it seems we should have this down by now, right? WRONG! He does not want to sleep in his crib. I have not been getting any sleep because we share a room with him, AND he will only sleep in our bed (which is not ideal for us because he can roll out of the bed or wake as I’m asleep and crawl off the bed). I have not kept a great schedule and have not been consistent, which has not helped with the situation at all. He’s a baby who likes a routine and consistency (all of my kids were not this way as babies), so I’m sure most of the problems we’re having with his sleep schedule is related to that in some ways.

I first thought to write this out as a way to only express my feelings, and go on with my day. However, I took my first class with Monique Melton this week called “Breaking Up with Perfectionism”. In this class, she talks about perfectionism and how it’s violent and damaging to who we are as people. Monique Melton is an Author, Speaker, and Anti-racism Educator and I found her through posts on Instagram. I encourage you to check out her work on Instagram at @moemotivate, and I invite you to also support her work. (This is NOT a sponsored post and I do not collect any payment or commission for any links that you click in this blog post).

Perfectionism is often pretending. Many times over the course of my life, I have pretended to be something I’m not. I have pretended that my house was spotless all the time, I am the perfect parent who cooks every meal at the exact same time every day, has perfect snacks laid out for all of the kids, all of our conversations are roses and butterflies, I’m always caught up on laundry, my husband and I never disagree, I am always smiling, praising Jesus at every moment, reading my Bible multiple times a day AND every day, all of my children have perfect sleep schedules (haha!), and I never shed any tears because my life is “perfect”. There is nothing wrong with this person, if they exist…”Jesus, is that you?” But let me tell you today, I am not them!

So, with all of my tears that I cried, I had to remember, I can only do what I can and it doesn’t make me a bad parent or a bad person. I want to encourage you to BE WHO YOU ARE! It’s okay if:

  • you don’t parent like someone else
  • you don’t have a job title like someone else
  • you don’t speak like someone else
  • you don’t look like someone else
  • you don’t act like someone else
  • you don’t think like someone else

It’s okay to have a tough day and say it. It’s okay to have a good day and say it. It’s okay to be yourself, no excuses. If you’re always trying to explain your reasons why, is it because you’re trying to fit into someone else’s idea of who/what/when/where/why/how you should be? If so, stop the excuses and STOP PRETENDING.

Have you ever found yourself pretending to have it all together for the purpose of people pleasing or to feel validated?

Sharing A Small Business Resource

This past week has been a good one with some challenges as I have been learning the ins and outs of owning my own business. I have so many ideas for the creative process, but I am also focusing on building a strong foundation.

I have come across a great resource that I want to share with you. SCORE. On SCORE’s website, they describe themselves as “the nation’s largest network of volunteer, expert business mentors, is dedicated to helping small businesses get off the ground, grow and achieve their goals.” (Score, 2020) I have watched webinars, read articles, and have a mentor through SCORE. Whether you already have a business or are just starting out, you will definitely benefit from their resources. A friend of mine referred me to them and the best part is that it’s all FREE.

When I found out we were going to have 5 children, I had anxiety about how I would still be able to work and be with my children. I had just started a business without a ton of knowledge and was a little uncertain. I never thought that owning my business could even be a reality. Learning daily from SCORE’s resources and from a mentor has motivated me to keep going. If you are looking into starting your own business or are a small business owner looking for resources, I encourage you to visit their website.

I am excited to share more details about my business with you soon! THANK YOU for being on this journey with me!


Business Consulting

As a small business owner just starting out and learning new things in the business field, I was so excited that my friend Jay Parsons (pictured here), launched his consulting business Hayah Consulting this week! At Hayah Consulting, individuals and businesses can benefit from Life Plans, Life and Leadership Coaching, and Organizational Development.

I met Jay back in 2016 when he became the Men’s Pastor at our church where I was also on staff. As I worked with him as an assistant, I was able to experience how Jay leads with integrity, could take on any leadership role, and had the most organized teams. I saw how his leadership and passion for helping others be the best version of themselves impacted many lives, including my family’s, while also mentoring students and young adults.

When I heard that Jay would be starting his own consulting business, Hayah Consulting, I was so excited! Now that it has officially launched, I am excited for others to experience the wisdom, compassion, and leadership that comes so naturally to him.

If you or your business are looking for someone to help you build your Life Plan, Life and Leadership Coaching, or Organizational Development, check out Hayah Consulting on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, and at Pass along this info to anyone you think would benefit from Hayah Consulting.

My Dear Sons

I had a few posts planned this week, but today’s post isn’t one of them. With the most recent mass shootings, officer involved shootings, and tragedies around the world, I just wanted to share some of the things I pray over all of my children, with today’s focus being more specific in how I pray for my sons…

To my dear sons: I pray for you daily. As I see the officer involved shootings, the crimes being committed daily, the hatred of others because of their skin color, the retaliation, anger and jealousy resulting in death, the hatred and murders of others because of their religion, their sexuality, and so many other things in this world, I pray extremely hard.

I pray that you live out the calling that God has over your lives. I pray for God to help me do everything I can as a mother to show you how to be honest, caring, young men who love and respect others no matter how different their beliefs or life path has been from yours. I pray that you both grow up to encourage others, pray with and for others, help the sick, poor, broken, widowed. I pray that you will never be so angry that you would want to do physical harm and end a life. I pray that you will be strong enough to seek help when needed, take care of yourselves spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I pray that you both will love who you are. I pray that others will love who you are. I pray that you will have friends who rally around you and support you. I pray that you will learn valuable lessons in life and grow in wisdom. I pray that you will both be amazing fathers if you choose to have children. I pray that you will teach these same things to my future grandchildren. I pray that you will be protected and that you will live long and healthy lives. I pray, every single day, that as you walk out the door, or when I walk out the door that it won’t be our last time seeing each other. I pray that no one sees either of you as a threat and that no one would be so angry or fearful of you that they would want to end your lives. I pray that I will never have to bury my children due to senseless acts of violence.

Lord I pray that you would lead us to trust you through all things. I pray that we will be people who love others and live our lives alongside others. Please help us. We need you in these desperate times. Thank you for the protection and covering you have had over our lives. Thank you for family, friends and brothers and sisters in Christ who we can join with in community and stand together in unity. Thank you for your love and the example of how we should love others through your son Jesus. I pray for peace and comfort for all who are reading this. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

“Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God’s law.” Romans 13:8

Happy Resurrection Day

Happy Resurrection Day from my family to yours! Today we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus!

Trying to get a “perfect” family picture just doesn’t happen these days, but I had to share anyway. Thankfully we don’t have to be perfect, and thank God that Jesus is so we can live in eternity with him!

We celebrated this day with a surprise baptism of our youngest daughter after our church service (socially distant and masks required). After a year of wanting to be baptized, she made the decision today!

Now it’s time for rest, dinner, and reflecting on the goodness of today. What a beautiful way to celebrate Jesus!

𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙎𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙮?


Hi friends! It’s been a few days and I haven’t been posting as often for a couple of reasons. One, my husband has been home on paternity leave for 6 weeks! It has been amazing so far! The second reason is because I have been speaking with a business mentor.

If you read my blog post on February 28th, 2021, I talked about how I took the steps to make Heartening Forward a business. I had no idea how I would do any of this with very limited resources, but I trusted that God would provide, and He did.

My mentor volunteers her time to mentor business owners. What I thought was really awesome is that my mentor specializes in helping people startup businesses and guides them through the process. It was exactly what I needed at the right time.

I know that there is someone out there who may read this and be where I was a year ago; unsure if you should start your business or take that step of faith. But I’m here to tell you, keep praying. Keep asking God to show you what He has for you in your life. He will show you.

Have your friends pray for you too. I admit that this whole process has been scary and I have procrastinated in some areas, but praying and having friends pray for me too has been helpful. One of my best friends and I ask each other “What are you avoiding today?” This helps us hold each other accountable and is something that has encouraged me to start my business.

Maybe you are the friend/family member who sees this in someone in your life. If this is you, encourage them today. Let’s lift one another up together. Let’s help one another see what God has for each of our lives. Let’s build up and experience the awesome things that people around us are doing. That’s what I’m excited to do through Heartening Forward. I’m going to encourage as I create.

It Will Be Okay

As I was rocking my 8 month old son Kai back to sleep early Thursday morning, I saw both my rented hospital grade and my Spectra breast pump over in the corner of my room. As I quickly glanced at them, tears started flowing.

Long story short, I was not able to breast feed any of my five children. I had so many difficulties and it just never happened. This last time, I tried to relactate with the hopes of exclusively pumping. But then I was diagnosed with ADHD along with PTSD and anxiety (mine is what they formerly called ADD if you go with the most recent guidelines, I’m told). Because of the medications that I take now, I cannot breastfeed or pump.

So I cried. I had so many tears because what I’d hoped for just didn’t happen. But then Thursday night I had something so beautiful happen. As I was rocking my son to sleep, he just kept fussing. So I tried shushing him gently and rocking more, but it didn’t work. So, I began singing to him, the same 5 songs that I sang to all of my children. He stopped fussing and calmed down immediately. Within 5 minutes, he was asleep. These are the same 5 songs that my older kids couldn’t fall asleep without. I ended up having to make a CD of me singing those songs so they could play them on repeat nightly.

God showed me something through this. Even though I was not able to breastfeed my children, God let me hold onto something so special that only I could give them as a mother. All of this was God’s reminder to me that it will be okay. So moms, if this is you, if this has been your struggle, look at the things that only you could give your children. It may not change the thing you would have liked to do, but it can help you to embrace and focus on the things that God has given you to do.

𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙢 𝙤𝙧 𝙣𝙤𝙩, 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙂𝙤𝙙 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙖𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩? 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙘𝙖𝙣’𝙩 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙚 𝙂𝙤𝙙 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙨 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙤 𝙃𝙞𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙃𝙞𝙢 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝? 𝙋𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙢𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨. 𝙄’𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙞𝙩.

Here We Are…Again

Friends, I am here with a heart full of tears. If you have been following me for a while, you know that this isn’t the first time I have talked about racial issues here on my blog. You also know that I am multiracial and two of those races are Filipino and Black. In this picture, you see my mom as a baby (her birthday is tomorrow!) and my grandmother, Emeteria, who I’m named after. So yes, the most current events with hate toward Asians hurts my heart.

My mom is Filipino, Mexican and Native American. To me, I never viewed my mom and her siblings as having a “look” that would immediately describe them as Asian-American. To others, they would “look” Asian-American. I remember when I worked with my mom and some people would describe her as “The little Asian lady”. With the most recent violence happening toward Asians here in America, I think of her and how closely she works with the public. I think of my Asian-American family. I think of my Asian-American friends. I think of Asians around the world who have faced this racism daily. It hurts my heart that we are here once again not being able to escape the pain of racism, oppression, and violence all because people have this idea that one race or the other is superior. And I have to say it. Stop Asian hate. It’s ugly.

I am tired, angry, disappointed. I am most disappointed that we have not taken the time to really listen to and care for our friends. I am disappointed that those of us who are Christians (myself included), we can only say “Pray and God will take care of the rest” when we all know that God gave us the commandment to love one another. We (should) show love by our actions to everyone, not just Christians. Simply praying for a job to fall in our lap doesn’t happen. You still have to apply for the job, show up to the interview, and show up to the job. We can’t pray and then sit back. God will give us the words to say and show us what to do. Didn’t he do that for Moses? Moses didn’t know what to say, but God did. Moses had to move with action, then God did what only He can do. Why can’t we take action by standing up for those we say we love? Why do we sit still and do nothing or do something for a time and then when it gets to be too much, we ignore the issues? I am including myself in all of this.

I may never have the answers to those questions, but I am going to continue to share the things I learn to help others be more aware and mindful of those we say we love. I am going to continue to stand up for those who are being persecuted, no matter what their race, skin color, gender, religious beliefs, etc. This is not a post to come down on one group. This is not a post to spread hatred. This is not a post to incite violence. This, my friends, is a cry for help. Help your friends of different races, skin color, gender, and religious beliefs. When we don’t understand, let’s ask questions. If we don’t know what to do, let’s ask our friends how we can help. Let’s be honest. Love. Truly. Can’t we at least try to stop saying “here we are…again”? I hope to.

I Know It’s Tough, But Hold On

Over the last few days I have been feeling a heaviness on my heart. I keep hearing stories of so many people struggling through times right now and committing suicide. There are so many who are struggling financially, emotionally, physically, mentally, relationally, and so many more ways.

I struggle with reaching out whenever I feel different things. Most of my family would never know that I had struggled so hard with anxiety and sometimes depression to the point where I was not sleeping or was thinking crazy thoughts. This struggle is so real! But just like some people may not have known, thankfully I had a very small amount of people who were concerned enough to reach out to me and I was able to seek help.

So I am thinking of all of you who are going through this alone or are surrounded by many but still feel alone. Those of you who need someone to just reach out because you’re maybe afraid to. Or maybe you feel that no one would believe you? I believe you. I know that in the moments you just want someone to care. I care. I am sharing this hoping that it reaches you. I am praying for you. We may not even know each other, but I pray specifically for you as someone who may be feeling what I’m also feeling or struggling through the things I listed above.

My plea is that you will seek help. If you would like emotional support or would like to talk through some of those thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. You don’t have to be thinking about suicide to call them. They will connect you to someone who is trained and able to help walk you through this. I will also have a link to their website in my bio (Instagram) at all times.

National Suicide Prevention Logo

I know it’s tough, just please, hold on a little longer. Long enough to seek help. Long enough for those feelings and thoughts to pass. I love you and I care! 🤍

International Women’s Day

“She is energetic and strong, a hard worker. Proverbs 31:17 NLT

“She extends a helping hand to the poor and opens her arms to the needy.” Proverbs 31:20 NLT

“She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.” Proverbs 31:25-26 NLT

The verses above are in reference to a “Wife with Noble Character”. I know that not every woman is a wife or a mother, but I definitely see these characteristics in the most influential women in my life. They are all beautiful, loving, caring, intelligent, selfless, kind, honest, fun, and adventurous; I could go on.

As we honor ALL women on International Women’s Day, I encourage you to honor those women in your life too. Not just today or this month (March is National Women’s Month), but every day. Send a text, make a phone call, or send them a card or gift to let them know you’re thinking of them.

Is ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀ ᴡᴏᴍᴀɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴄᴇʟᴇʙʀᴀᴛᴇ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ᴏғ ʜᴇʀ ɪɴғʟᴜᴇɴᴄᴇ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪғᴇ?