If I said I was nailing this life thing, I would be lying. Being home in a pandemic brought up some real things for us as a family. A few things we are learning is that maybe more than one of our children have ADHD. I have been recently diagnosed, our oldest daughter has been diagnosed and my husband is next on getting an official diagnosis.
So what does that mean for our family? I can’t tell you. I have never heard of a family with both parents that have ADHD (different types) and trying to also raise multiple children with it as well. I’m sure they’re out there, but in this area, I have never felt so alone. Not because I don’t have friends or family to lean into, but because it’s very difficult to explain ADHD to someone who doesn’t have it. Most people, when they think of ADHD, they think of someone with behavior and hyperactivity issues only. I used to think this way too.
ADHD is always something I’m trying to learn more about because I know so little. As we go through the process, I plan to share all that we learn. I do know though, as a mom raising 5 kids, I always wondered why I could never finish anything I start, stick to a schedule, stay consistent with anything, and am always late to everything, even when I get up 3-4 hours early. I am so easily distracted getting off track and by then end of the day, I’m exhausted and feel defeated because I have been trying to complete at least one task. The crazy thing is, when I was a teen in school and before children, this was my exact life, same struggles without children, but I thought it was normal to be all over the place because I was just “young and ambitious”.
I share all of this to tell you that mental health is so important. Don’t wait to be evaluated because others are telling you that it’s normal to live in complete chaos with or without multiple children (because it’s not). Don’t wait because you’re afraid that someone will judge you or make fun of you or tell you that “we all have some form of ADHD” because not everyone does. In fact 90-95% of people do not have ADHD (adhdawarenessmonth.org). Don’t wait because you’re afraid to be medicated. You have options to explore.
Check with your insurance provider to see if they cover some of the cost for mental health. Our insurance provider does and it has been so helpful. If you’re feeling like you have been going through this alone and need someone to talk to, reach out, even here. I will share all that I learn and I really hope this helps someone out there to get the help they need and to feel seen and heard too.