This is a question I have been asking myself for quite some time now. One of my best friends always asks herself this question which has helped me so much. Over the last three years, I have dealt with some pretty tough stuff with family, friends, coworkers, etc. More recently, there’s been some hurtful things said about me. I think we have all had some version of this in our lives at one point or another.
Over the years I became accustomed to seeking the advice of family, friends, and coworkers. I would share some of the personal details and issues with those I thought were closest to me. I learned quickly that my personal life became gossip for others. I also learned that some things that I shared in confidence (about me) were later used against me.
I’m sure I hurt others too. I know in all of my frustration of feeling betrayed, I put up walls. I have also learned that some of the boundaries I put up, with no explanation, were what I was supposed to do. But for a long time I had wrestled with this in an effort to people please or because I didn’t want to seem “less Christian” because I put up my boundaries.
Today, instead of seeking the advice and validation of others, it’s so much more wise for me to take things to God instead of choosing gossip. In conversations, some things are often left out, but God knows all things. He will show me when it’s necessary to speak about things to others or not. He may put people in our lives to trust with some of these things along the way, but I truly believe that he wants us to go to Him first.
As I thought and prayed about this topic this week, I was led to these verses. I pray it helps you to seek God’s guidance in how to respond and to remember that it’s the Lord’s battle to fight for us.
"Not only that—count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—give a cheer, even!—for though they don't like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten into this kind of trouble." Matthew 5:11-12 MSG
"GOD will fight the battle for you. And you? You keep your mouths shut!" Exodus 14:14 MSG
"Now, who will want to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you suffer for doing what is right, God will reward you for it. So don't worry or be afraid of their threats. Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it. But do this in a gentle and respectful way. Keep your conscience clear. Then if people speak against you, they will be ashamed when they see what a good life you live because you belong to Christ. Remember it is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, than to suffer for doing wrong!" 1 Peter 3:13-17 NLT
"Truthful words stand the test of time, but lies are soon exposed." Proverbs 12:19 NLT