This picture was taken Monday of this week (12/14/2020). It was just before I went to the emergency room (2nd time in about a month’s time) I had chest pains, pain in my left shoulder and neck, and numbness in my left arm. My heart was pounding. I was frantic, but trying to remain calm. Earlier that same day, I had an unexpected, unannounced visit that sent me into full on anxiety. I had calmed down by the middle of the day, so I thought.
I want to be clear, I am not blaming my recent visit to the hospital on that one unexpected visit alone. I am learning that scenarios similar to that and my mental health history has a way of triggering things in me. The final result of the ER visit, a session with my mental health therapist, and a follow up doctor appointment with my primary care were interesting. A pinched nerve on the left side had flared up, I had a panic attack and I had already been dealing with anxiety.
It’s so interesting that all of these things happened as I was wearing this shirt that says “Adonai Lord of all”. God is Lord of all, so why has my anxiety been so bad lately? I can only come up with one thing for me personally. I know this may be different for everyone, but for me, I haven’t completely given my mental health issues over to God.
I believe that God is Lord of all things that I face daily. Yet I need a daily reminder to actually surrender every part of my life to him. I’m thankful for the therapists, doctors, and people that God has placed in my life that are here for a plan and a purpose. I’m thankful to be able to share these things with you in the event you are struggling too.
This week I have taken some time to rest and spend time with my family. This upcoming week I look forward to celebrating an anxiety-less Christmas. I pray the same over you. I pray for peace, comfort, joy, laughter, and love to fill your heart this holiday season.